Junkies are big fans of goals!  Mainly because we know the power of goal-setting when it comes to achieving the things you want in life…  Vision Boards, Written Goals, BHAG Goals, Systems, Rewards, Visual Reminders – Bring ’em on – I LOVE THEM ALL!!!

And there’s one particular phrase when it come to goal setting that ALWAYS gets me at my core.  I don’t know where it comes from… I’ve tried googling various versions of it… If you know more, please pass it along because I would love to properly attribute it to the correct source/s…

Here it is…

Peace and harmony is not the goal.
Progress is the goal.
And progress is rarely achieved
in the midst of peace and harmony.

That. Phrase. Makes. My. Soul. SING!!!  And – it applies to soooooooooo many situations in life, it’s not even funny!  How?  Well – let me count the ways (starting in pageant-land of course…)

PEACE AND HARMONY is NOT the GOAL

So…. think about this… If “peace and harmony” was the true goal of your pageant life, I’d venture to say, you’d never get off the couch.  Why?  Because “peace and harmony” means keeping things exactly as they are!  Peace and harmony means never working out to improve your body.  Peace and harmony means never pushing yourself academically.  Peace and harmony means taking a nap when you should be practicing your talent.  Peace and harmony means desperately trying to get along with everyone instead of standing up for your platform issue and never offering an opinion of any kind during your interview.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t try to get along with people... That’s not what I’m saying at all.

What I’m saying – is that you need to make sure you’re not constantly chasing after peace and harmony.  If so, you’re going to have a pretty short stint as a pageant contestant… Because…

Pageants, are about improving yourself.

Pageants are a vehicle you can use to become something better than you are right now.  They have this bizarre way about them that refuses to let you settle for less than your best…  It’s as if a pageant allows you to strive for something that YOU KNOW exists deep within you!  Something that matters.  Something that will cause you to be better than you are right now.

So – if ‘peace and harmony’ isn’t the goal… What is the goal?

PROGRESS IS THE GOAL

Making just a small amount of progress each day adds up to a whole heck of a lot of progress by the end of the month!  Think about it!  Let’s say you start with 20 push-ups on the 1st day of the month… And you decide you’re going to add 1 more pushup a day, every day, until the end of the month.  By the end of the month, you’ll be doing 50 push-ups a day instead of just 20!  Same thing with squats or running or cardio or planking or whatever (going just a little bit longer each day).

But if all you want is peace and harmony – I’m afraid none of that is gonna happen.  The whole point of exercise is to PUSH YOURSELF!  You should be focused on MAKING PROGRESS!  It’s not about the status quo – it’s about GETTING BETTER!

So – How do you know if you’re chasing peace and harmony over progress?  Well, if you find yourself making decisions just because it will “shut someone up” – or if you spend a lot of your time trying to determine “what’s fair” – you’re officially chasing peace and harmony over progress.  Your job isn’t to make peace and harmony for other people.  Your job is to make progress on your own goals.

Now again – does that mean you should trample all over other people to get what you want?  NOOOOO!!!  Of course not!

It means – when you make decisions for your own life – you need to make the decision that offers the most amount of PROGRESS towards your goals — NOT the most amount of peace and harmony once the decision is implemented.

And guess what…?

YOU RARELY ACHIEVE PROGRESS in the MIDST of PEACE and HARMONY

It’s pretty much impossible to see “progress” in your platform – or with your talent – or in the shape of your body – if you’re not willing to work for it.  If all you’re doing is trying to “keep the peace” – then, honestly, it means you’re not working very hard and I don’t expect you’ll make much progress.

Anything worth having, is worth the fight to get it.

Nobody walks on the Miss America stage without significant time, effort, energy, and money devoted to reaching that goal.   And nobody reaches the Miss America stage without making progress from the place they were – to the place where they are right now (ask any titleholder – they’ll tell you!).

You’ve got to go through a time of “change” – a time of “pushing” – a time that goes AGAINST the balance of peace and harmony, if you’re going to achieve any sort of progress in your life.  Substantive, legitimate, life-changing progress doesn’t happen in the midst of peace and harmony.  It only happens when you tell yourself that your personal progress (and the pain/sacrifice associated) will offer you the ‘peace and harmony’ you’re seeking, once you reach your goals.

Most of us – myself included – would prefer to live a peaceful and harmonious life.  Progress is hard  whereas peace and harmony seems easy.  But your strength does not come from peace and harmony in your life.  Your best “you” only comes when you require more of yourself.

From Douglas Malloch’s poem called, “Good Timber”

Good timber does not grow with ease:
The stronger wind, the stronger trees;
The further sky, the greater length;
The more the storm, the more the strength.
By sun and cold, by rain and snow,
In trees and men good timbers grow.

Do you want to be someone who progresses in life?  Do you truly want to grow and become a better version of yourself?

Then don’t make decisions based on what brings peace and harmony.  Make decisions based on what brings the most progress.

Progress is the goal.

#BigJunkieLove

Carrie Lakey

To see more Thursday BlogDay posts like this one, just click here…

Carrie Lakey is kind of obsessed with Miss America…
So are 15,000 of her closest friends.

As an avid fan of the Miss America Organization, Carrie began
publicly predicting pageant winners over 10 years ago.
Now, she’s galvanizing an online movement of fans
known as “Pageant Junkies”.
Learn more about the Junkie Nation
by clicking here.

You know… Social Media is a lot like deodorant.  You know you need it, you know it helps people want to be around you more often, and you don’t fully realize the impact it has until you go a day without it!

Yeah, yeah, yeah… Most people don’t necessarily equate “deodorant” to something like social media… Social Media is a fun time waster… A great promotional tool… And an amazing way to stay in touch with people you haven’t seen in a thousand years (but, ummm yeah – deodorant???).

I’m here to tell you that pageant contestants should realize social media can be used for much more than just “keeping in touch” or tagging your sponsors in your latest photos.  The truth is…

Social media creates awesome pageant contestants.

Personally, I call it the “Social Media Super Cycle” – and here’s how it goes…

YOU CREATE A FOLLOWING

When you’re good at social media, people can’t wait to see what you post next!  They wanna know what you’re going to post tomorrow.  They begin to identify your posts simply by looking at the photo (before they ever see your name).  They’re drawn to you – and they don’t want to miss anything that comes from YOU!

Likewise – When you’re bad at social media – It’s easy to forget you, or worse yet – it’s easy for people to un-friend you, because you’re wasting their time (ugh).

Not to state the obvious – But, if people are constantly un-friending you, I’m afraid you’re not very good at social media.  Soooooooo – what’s the best way to create a following???

Post Frequently.

You can’t create a following if you’re only posting every once in a while!  The best way to increase your following is to post regularly… However – be sure to post stuff that matters (not just what you ate today… or how sweaty you are after your workout today… )

Why not create your own content?  Maybe a blog or a podcast?  You can create your own hashtag (for your platform or for something you post regularly about). Make an effort to create your own campaign that draws people to you.  I promise – The more you to do it, the better you’ll get.  And the better you get – the bigger your following will become!

Once you create a following, something else inevitably happens…

YOU BECOME FAMILIAR

Think about your favorite celebrity’s social media account.  Chances are, you kinda feel like you “know” them… That’s why people make creeper comments like, “I swear, Taylor Swift and I would be total besties if she only knew me!!!” 🙂

When you’re good at social media, people will begin to solidify their following of you, because you’ll be familiar.  It will seem like you’re friends – even though you may have only met once (or maybe never at all!).  In fact, don’t be surprised if random strangers come running up to you in the grocery store and wanna have a conversation about your life!  What makes someone do that?  Comfort and Familiarity through social media. 🙂

Here’s the good news – Becoming familiar to your audience is a HUGE plus!  You show that your life isn’t perfect.  You’re not a plastic figure with a crown.  In fact, you’re no different than anyone else… You’re not up on a pedestal – You are fully accessible… touchable… and utterly familiar (in the digital sense). 🙂

When you master the art of familiarity on social media, this is when the cycle gets good!  The more familiar you are, the more your following will increase.  And once that happens…

NOW, YOU’RE THE FAVORED CHOICE

Anybody can get appearances because they wear a crown.

But if you want to speak in front of organizations that matter and connect with people who can help you make a real difference – Then you need to get good at social media.

Let’s be honest here.  People usually choose to interact with someone they know.  Rarely does anyone get hired from a flyer or without any recommendations whatsoever.  Why?  Because people want to know you’re not a wacko!  I’m sure you’re a lovely person – but nobody wants to be the one who booked a wacko… And one way for me to determine if you are in fact, a wacko, is through your blog/website/podcast/social media.

So – Wanna book more appearances?  Then get good at social media.

That way, people will see who you are before they ever meet you!  They’ll read your blog and ask you to come speak (trust me – it happens!).  They’ll see your tweets about articles that are important to you (aka – become familiar).  They’ll see your website and learn how it aligns with the goals and values for the organization they represent (which usually means, “not a wacko”).

If you want to expand your networking base – and get appearances that matter – people need to know who you are.  They can’t know who you are if you’re not frequently posting on social media.  They can’t trust you if the last blog update you wrote was 4 months ago.  And I’m sorry – but they won’t even consider booking you if they’re even slightly unsure about what you might say (*cough – wacko*).

But once you start becoming the favored choice – Do you know what happens?

THE CYCLE CONTINUES…

Yup!  Once you get the chance to speak, then you’ll gain more people who want to follow you!  And once more people start following you – then you’ll become more and more familiar to them!  And once you become more and more familiar – You’ll become their favored choice to be at an event or speak to a group of people! 🙂

Lather, Rinse, Repeat (to continue our hygiene analogy).

In summary, the “Social Media Super Cycle” isn’t just a tool… Social Media really does create AWESOME pageant contestants!

Just like deodorant. 🙂

So, do yourself (and the rest of us) a big favor… Make sure you don’t forget either one of them, today!!! 🙂

#BigJunkieLove

Carrie Lakey

If you’d like to read more Thursday BlogDay posts like this one, just click here…

Carrie Lakey is kind of obsessed with Miss America…
So are 15,000 of her closest friends.

As an avid fan of the Miss America Organization, Carrie began
publicly predicting pageant winners over 10 years ago.
Now, she’s galvanizing an online movement of fans
known as “Pageant Junkies”.
Learn more about the Junkie Nation
by clicking here.